The Insomniac Ramblings

To say that I'm not the greatest blogger is pretty accurate. I'm truly not. In the last few months I've often just stay in bed trying to sleep without getting up. Sometimes it is just hard to get up.

Other times I've only been able to get through the night after having taken something.

I did have a pretty miserable summer. The insomnia was exacerbated by the cold urticaria. The urticaria has been mostly under control after seeing the allergist and getting my very own Epi-pen. Still getting to that point a few weeks ago would have tried the patience of a saint.

Today is the end of a 48-hour no sleep. That particular cycle broke last night. Now I have to try to catch up on sleep before the end of the weekend.

Peace,

The Insomniac

First before anything else.  I've got to say I have no idea what the title of the previous post means.  The last word is "medication."  Hmm..  The things I think of when taking Ambien.  Oy!

The second thing I want to say, is yes, the bathroom had a water problem that night.  There was actually water leaking from the second floor into the dining room.

Tonight I'm out of meds.   I'm wide awake and very sleepy at the same time.  I've got a headache   It is going to be a long day.  I have been to bed.  I went about 11ish.  I did fall asleep but kept waking up.  I probably woke up 6 times between 11p and 2:30a.  Uggh.  Why bother anymore.  The good news is the chores are done and the laundry is nonexistent.

Tell me about going to sleep.  What runs through your mind when you are trying to go to sleep.  I've realized that I do not think of good things.  Everything from rehashing arguments that happened years ago with people I no longer have contact with to financial problems to being embarrassed all over again about something that happened in childhood.  Never sunshine and flowers.  Always doom and gloom.  


I wonder why that is.  I wonder if it happens to everyone.  Maybe if I had sunshine and flowers to send me off to sleep I'd go to sleep easier.  Can I make that happen?  I do not have a bad life.  I'm fairly content and on good days would even consider myself happy.  

Definitely something to think about at times other than when I'm trying to go to sleep. 

Hope you are sleeping well.


The Insomniac

I had a good day.  Yes, I was exhausted through most of it.  I did not do much around the house.  I did wash and dry pants so I could get dressed.  Once I got dressed I went to see a friend.  

I did not realize exactly how good a friend she is until today.  We have children about the same age have the quite a few of the same interests and go to the same church.  We have talked on occasion and emailed more frequently than that.  

Part of my stress was having no one to talk to.  It is not the same talking to the hubby as it is talking to a girlfriend.  While I can speak about my hopes, dreams, fears and day-to-day life with the hubby.  He doesn't get it the way another woman will.  He freely admits this.  

Since we moved to this town a year ago, I have not had that kind of connection with anyone.   So I visited my friend - quite possibly my bestie.  We talked about quite a few things.  Oh, we talked.  Neither one of us realized how much time had passed.  I no longer feel so alone in the world and am very blessed to have found her.

There were other good things that happened.  I got rid of some more stress by bowing out of a toxic situation.  I really cannot say more about what the situation was.  Again, maybe one day I'll have readers.  I'd hate to piss off the other party (not family by the way) by airing dirty laundry.